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waitressingwoes:

i want to wait tables there. holy. shit.

waitressingwoes:

i want to wait tables there.
holy.
shit.

(via fuckyeahwaitressingwarbler)

forever:

can acne not do the thing where it exists 

(via r-l-b-m-u-t-m-o-c)

I pissed off some teen age kid at a table I was serving.

  • Me: I'm sorry, I'll be back with the right plate
  • Him: whatever
  • *as I turn to walk away*
  • Him: *talking to his friends* he's probably a homo, he's too distraught.
  • *i turn back to the table*
  • Me: you know, you shouldn't talk about the dude who's about to serve your food, right beside him. Also, learn the definition of homo, it's a root word that means, "man" in which yes I am a man, more of one than you will ever dream to be. So if you're intentions were referring to me being a homoSEXUAL as in MAN-sexual, which I am, then use a correct form of it. Now, sit there little boy, while this gay man goes to get your food for you.
  • *i leave and come back*
  • Me: here's your AIDs stuffed burrito you ordered.
  • His friends tipped me $20

Read the fucking coupon

fuckyeahwaitressingwarbler:

Read the fucking coupon

Read the fucking coupon

Read the fucking coupon

  1. Read the fucking coupon

Read the fucking coupon

  • Read the fucking coupon

Read the fucking coupon

Read the fucking coupon

Read the motherfucking goddamned coupon (ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧ 

fuckyeahwaitressingwarbler:

no but seriously…i need your I.D.

fuckyeahwaitressingwarbler:

no but seriously…i need your I.D.